Things regarding my Graduation-Roadblock.THE MODERN HIDALGO: Entry_072
Written: Thursday. December 12, 2019.
Today’s Journal Entry is the first entry that I’m writing as a free man. I’ve been incarcerated for a while. But now, I’m free as a bee. I can do anything I want, as long as it’s within the realm of possibility. Although, I could actually write stuff that’s beyond the realm of — you get the point.
Basically, what I’m saying is this: I’ve finally dropped out of college.
It happened yesterday. But, if I’m gonna be honest, I didn’t expect it to happen until January. I had prepared to talk about dropping out of college with my parents…on January. Probably on the week of enrollment. But my mom initiated the conversation yesterday, on what I was planning to do with my thesis. So, one thing lead to another — you know, honestly, whatever happened yesterday hasn’t subsided in me yet.
I literally woke up today and was skeptical of whether or not the events of yesterday were actually real or not. It was, but my mind hasn’t processed it yet.
Although I’m getting there. Slowly, but surely.
I’ve been out of the funk of writing for the last days, cause all I could think about was ‘how am I gonna tell my parents that I sabotaged my own chance of finishing college’. I haven’t been reading (hopefully I’ll be able to pick up a book later after this). I exercised again. Got myself to do some workouts awhile ago, so that’s cool.
I haven’t done a morning walk yet, so far. Again, ‘hopefully I get to wake up early in the morning to do some walking’.
And here I am, writing again. Like I used to. And my laptop’s leaking again, like it used to.
I haven’t been making videos yet, though. I’m still finding the opportunity to do so. It’s really hard, especially if I’m sharing a room with my brother. If I didn’t, then I’d be making videos everyday.
Every. Single. Day.
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I’ve been binge-watching the Ben 10 series. The original Ben 10 series, not the reboot. Not yet. I will, but I have to finish all of the original series first.
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I’ll be reading 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea by Jules Verne again after this. I kind of put down the book when I reached the end of Part 1 of the story, cause I thought that would give me the focus I needed in order to get started with my thesis. Kind of a funny thing to think about now, actually.
I’ve forgotten most of what happened in the story. It’s no big deal, though. Verne’s writing style is very verbose; Prolific on explanation. Which kind of trails off sometimes to the actual plot of the story. Or actually writing too much plot is making it seem kind of dragging to read.
I’ve got a lot on my plate, right now. In terms of my to-be-read. Now that I’m a free man, I can start reading The Wheel of Time.
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I refused to read it because of the whole ‘I need to focus on thesis’ thing. And if I were to read the Wheel of Time while I was doing my thesis, I wouldn’t be able to enjoy it. That was my thought process as to why I moved it for after I graduate.
But since that shit’s not happening anymore, I gotta rethink my to-be-read lineup.
*side note: “The Graduation-Roadblock” was a pseudonym-esk term I developed for the word “Thesis”, since I despise that word so much.*
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Also, I went on to watch a bunch of my old videos. Not the older videos that I shot on my Flare S4 Lite. The recent videos that I shot with my Flare S7 Plus. The ones where I spend 8–12 minutes talking to the camera.
I did this, partly because I wanted to see how my style was when I was still starting to do those long videos, and also because I needed to list down the videos that I’m gonna put within the “Inner Machinations” series.
To further explain, I have this new idea(it’s actually a month-old idea, since I was supposed to have started it last month) about turning all of these talkative videos that I have into a specific entity of its own.
It lacked a title, a name, or a symbol. So I thought of one real quick, and Bob’s your uncle, The Inner Machinations was born. Hooray.
This idea kind of contradicts what I previously said in my recent “Not So Quick Updates” video, though. I said there that I’ll be using the “Not So Quick Updates” as a uniformed title for the types of videos where I talk about the current happening in my life, and other stuff.
But hearing it out loud seemed like “Inner Machinations” was exactly the same idea…but for the talkative videos that I’ve made.
So, I can’t do the same thing twice. I would still do the “Not So Quick Updates” every 100 subscribers that add to my channel. But the “Inner Machinations” idea needs to be the main thing. It’ll be the weekly show of my channel. To which, in the far future, if that series succeeds, I’ll remake it as the title for my Podcast.
It would be in the future. The Podcast, I mean. Because I can’t do that right now. Nobody’s gonna listen to me talking with a bunch of other people for an hour and a half. So…
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I don’t really have anything to talk about anymore.
I’ve been kind of out of cool stories to tell these days, seeing as I’ve been hanging around the house for quite some months now. I’m literally tired of waiting for 2019 to end already.
Like, give me 2020 already. The 2019 Plot Twist has happened already, man. I’ve already dropped out of college. That’s the plot twist of the year. I’m not even excited for Christmas anymore. I want the new year to arrive already.
See how it looks if you try stretching out a journal entry to a thousand words? You end up sounding like a mad man.
Speaking of which , I was supposed to use “Ramblings of a Mad Man” instead of “Inner Machinations”.
But I didn’t…
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