Discipline, Classic Doctor Who, Junk Food.THE MODERN HIDALGO: Entry_081.
Written: Wednesday. February 5, 2020.
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I uploaded a new video today. It’s an episode review of the first serial for the Classic Doctor Who series, titled “An Unearthly Child.” I thought I’d hate it once I was done editing the thing. I mean, I still kinda dislike it, but I also like how I was able to make a new video in so long.
I don’t do vlogs anymore. Or at least, for now. It’s an annoying task to find the confidence in me to share a current event in my life. But honestly, I guess it’s just me hating how I record videos. Cause it’s tough to vlog if I can’t see myself on the camera. I don’t have a flip monitor on my DSLR — I’ve said this a thousand times on this journal, and I’m still saying it now. So I’m gonna stop doing that.
But yeah, I’m sort of uninterested to vlog right now. I’m more interested in doing reviews, though. Like Series Reviews or Cartoon Reviews. I’m preparing myself for an Anime Review of Combattler V. I’m almost there. Just a few more episodes, then I’m done.
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But the reviews are just the beginning. I’m going to be making a whole bunch of other videos relating to the Anime. Just so I could compensate on the time I’ve lost watching the show. It’s been more than a month. Or at least, it feels like it.
I’m getting bored of it, not gonna lie. The series is repetitive in its storytelling; predictable. It could honestly be better, but it chooses not to.
Can’t wait to watch Voltes V and Daimos. *sense my sarcasm, please*
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Last Friday up to Sunday were the best days of my year, so far. I was able to secretly go to a Batangas Vacation House with my friend, Kurt.
There was no Internet. I didn’t bother vlogging — well, I did, but only on the first morning. Then the rest of the vacation was just me enjoying playing billiards and eating a bunch of junk food.
Yes, I’m allowed to eat junk food again. And it was a hell of a good experience. It feels like I really have this freedom to just eat and eat and eat all the junk food I desire, because I deprived myself of it for a whole year.
And I didn’t feel guilty or upset or regretful of my decision to start eating junk food again. It was a good feeling, nothing more.
But I did grow a few pimples as a result, but that’s fine. It comes with the habit. Plus, I might not actually be able to eat junk food again for the foreseeable future. Mainly, because I won’t really buy junk food on my own, and my mom doesn’t really buy junk food anyway. She just buys Fudgee Bar, and I’m okay with that.
It’s Balance. It’s Discipline. It’s Freedom, because Discipline equals Freedom. It results to freedom. So get Disciplined, son. You’ll be free once you do so.
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I’ve started a new thing, I dunno if I mentioned this in my recent entry. I’m doing this voice recording thing of me just talking about random stuff in my head. And then I post it on one of my Youtube Channels so that I have this feeling of purpose on doing that task. It fools me into thinking that it’s important. Maybe it is, to me. But I dunno if it’ll ever be interesting for other people.
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But I feel like it’s like this journal, but for talking. This journal’s purpose is for me to keep on writing for the sake of writing and thoroughly improve the way that I write. And the voice recording is for me to keep on talking for the sake of talking and thoroughly improving the way I speak.
Because I’m a shitty speaker. I stutter a lot of times. It’s annoying. It doesn’t help if I want people to listen to what I say.
I’ve done two sessions of it. So I dunno if it’s helping or not. But it gets my mind off of the things that I get to talk about in the records. I might do a session after this one.
I haven’t been doing much of my ordinary routines as of late. I dunno, I don’t feel like exercising for the sake of exercising. I just don’t feel that inclined or something. Maybe it’s because I lost a part of me that needed to do it. Because my workout sessions weren’t really for me to get in shape. Sure, that’s the given reason as to why we need to work out. But to me, it was for finding balance with myself.
I exercise because I’m annoyed with something, or I’m just mad, or pissed off because of something I heard. I workout to get those emotions out of the way and move forward.
But in the absence of those emotions as of late — since I don’t really get that bothered with stuff like I used to — there’s no reason for me to exercise, rather than to keep myself in shape.
I could get fat and grow a big belly, but that stuff’s inevitable. I guess what I’m saying is that I may need to find that emotion again. Or find a new reason for me to work out everyday. Cause right now, I’d rather just be spending time watching a bunch of movies in a day, rather than spend half my energy for the day and sleep because of my lack of energy.
My body’s finally reached the after-prime, I guess. It’s not in its highest potential anymore, I suppose.
I’ve been lazy on reading stuff, as well. Honestly. Xenocide by Orson Scott Card is long, and I wish it wasn’t. Because it’s a good story so far, but the amount of words the author is using just to get on with the story is profoundly many. And I just wanna see where it’s all going, cause I can’t really see where it is going. Can’t determine where the story is headed.
Sometimes, that’s a good thing. But for this book, not so much.
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