Written: Friday. February 11, 2022.
These are days before the coming storm, it would seem, Because of how calm the air feels around me, lately. Axie Infinity brought down the SLP gain for Adventure Mode a few days ago, and now we have to meet a required quota each day, which we didn't need to do prior to the new season update.
This brings me at a difficult situation. I originally planned on playing the game to save up enough money to either buy a new tablet or laptop or even a new computer. But because of this radical change in the system, the original plan is a bust, whether I like it or not. I would want to still play the game until May or June, but that'll all be up to the managers at this point. My performance as a scholar under them is obviously not gonna be looked over...wait is that how you say it? Are they gonna look over it or have it looked at? I dunno. Either way, I'm screwed if they decide to let me go.
I'll probably still get the 70% I've collected for the current month, but I really have no idea if they'll still let me play my account due to my ill performance. I could spend time trying to make myself get better at the game, but a part of me doesn't want to do that because that involved wasting my time actually trying to get better. I was already okay with the thought of just getting by, because I'm not really trying to get a lot of money from this game for each day. I just want enough that could get me going by May or June.
At the end of the day, it's all up to the managers. And I'll just be here waiting for what would happen to me next.
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One of the things I've realized in this sort of post-academic chapter of my life, is that I'm slowly losing my Main Character Complex. What that means is that I'm slowly learning not to treat life as though everything revolves around me and the actions that I choose to make. I'm slowly understanding the meaning of just trying to make ends meet, even though I'm probably not allowed to say that, since I haven't actually paid bills yet. But I think you get the point. I'm not aspiring for something that's too high up there to even reach based on my caliber. I no longer need to feel the sense that all of what I'm doing is leading up to something big in the future; that I may or may not even achieve most of the things I've wanted to achieve in life a few years ago.
Maybe it's also because of this long term radical shift in the status quo that all of us are experiencing together. Covid literally changed everybody's lives. For better or worse, is honestly still something I can't answer. But I'm definitely starting to get used to that radical change by now. I'm slowly accepting that it just is what it is at this point...yet I don't know if that's actually a good thing, or something I can't see as actually being a sad turnout for this sort of narrative.
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